January was the longest year month EVER!
Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Extraordinary weather events, unprecedented wildfires, unparalleled political upheaval.
I wouldn’t consider myself an anxious person, but for the last 30+ days, my heart has been pounding, and my imagination reeling.
It feels like:
Girl getting sprayed by a stream of water.
I recently spent an evening with some close friends, and during one sidebar conversation, one friend asked how I was doing.
Me: “I don’t know. Not great.”
Her: “What’s going on?”
Me: “I feel like I don’t have control over anything.”
Her: “Anything?”
There is it. The reality check.
And she’s right. My anxiety has kept me in ‘always/never/everything/nothing’ thinking. As we continued talking, I could start to see that there IS a lot I still have control over.
I work hard to control what I can and let go of the rest. This can be easier said than done.
Huge exhale.
It’s interesting…I have been writing this monthly newsletter for years, and I have never covered the topic of mental health.
If you’ve been with me for a while, you know the format: I share a recent personal experience and turn it into a leadership lesson with what I hope are helpful tips.
This recent experience feels VERY personal…and vulnerable. Writing about it helps create some perspective.
AND, I’m not alone. I’m grateful for my work…it distracts me from the endless ‘next thing’ to worry about. Likely something over which I have no control.
So, what does this have to do with leadership?
The workplace is full of humans. As humans, our reactions to our environment can vary widely based on our beliefs and life experience. Ten people can witness the same event and experience it in ten different ways.
During ‘uncertain times’…how can we, as leaders, support our team members when events of the day (or THEIR day) challenge their mental health?
Build trust. It goes without saying that leaders need to create a culture of trust WAY before challenging times show up. Without it, leaders will be hard-pressed to connect with their team members in a supportive, meaningful way.
As Brené Brown says: “Trust is a product of vulnerability that grows over time and requires work, attention, and full engagement.”
Leaders create trust and psychological safety by demonstrating empathy, normalizing risk-taking and encouraging open communication.
Which leads to…
You go first. How is the situation having an impact on you? If you want others to open up, lead by example.
“Look, I get it. There is so much uncertainty…it’s hard to know how we’re going to be impacted. I’m feeling a bit unsteady too, and I want to make sure we ALL get the answers we need to feel on solid ground. What kind of support do you need from me? How can we support each other?”
Often, it’s the feeling that ‘no one can understand how I’m feeling’ that keeps us stuck. As a leader, sharing that YOU can relate to their fears can help bust the belief that they’re alone in their experience.
AND…make sure YOU are practicing the self-care needed to support others and their needs.
Know your resources. I’m not a mental health professional, and I’m guessing you aren’t either. In some cases, an employee’s support needs are out of our depth.
Does your organization have an employee assistance program, or EAP? If yes, that might be a good place to start. If not, leverage your HR business partners for support.
For team members who are really struggling, point them toward resources that can help. Here’s an article with more suggestions to consider.
It’s key to remember that ‘uncertain times’ create uncertain impacts, and as leaders, it’s our job to meet our people where they are. The speed of change is accelerating, and we need to make sure that OUR mental health needs are being met as well.
Be sure to put your oxygen mask on first…